It always looks good on paper. I have signed up for 2 Midnight OT shifts. I went to bed with the girls to squeeze in a nap of sorts before I had to get up at 11 and get ready for work. Although I thought I was stealth I found my oldest awake and she knew I was leaving as I had explained the morning plan before we went to bed.

I tried multiple time to explain she needed to go back to sleep and I would be home shortly after her eyes were open. Yeah, right.
Leaving your warm bed in the dark is just not a concept that kids understand.
No, I can't call and say I can't make it.
I had to leave her in my bed crying, waving out the window and whispering I love you's thru the open bedroom window.
I have officially just lost a tiny bit of my heart to this place instead of to this sweet girl.
In hopes of explaining it better I told her this night away affords me the chance to take next Saturday off to see her play soccer. I had hoped that would help but it seemed to only bring the anxiety that soccer was starting soon. God, she is her Mother's daughter.
Another reason why these upcoming life changes will be for the best. I live for these kids and will do anything not to climb out of a warm bed with them to come here and deal with kids who need better parents.