Saturday, January 14, 2017

Winter Mt Watatic

January 1st.
I wanted to be somewhere. I wanted to set my intent for the year. I have been out of the woods, real woods for a long time. The Holidays and the stumble in my Winter hiking confidence I guess. 
After gathering my gear and weather report on where to find snow I headed back to Ashburnham. 
Why not? I have hiked it before so I know what I am doing so it would make a great first real Winter hike.
In my life you learn to roll with the punches so I have a complete back pack with microspikes and snow shoes to cover whatever the conditions are and to just practice carrying the load and OF COURSE I leave my lunch bag on the stove. 
Surprisingly, I am able to hook myself up just fine at a gas station store with yogurt, hard boiled eggs, cheese sticks and nuts. 
I'll let you scroll through the photos but I mean really?? The day was incredible. I was an epic geek master and excited to use all the equipment.
Hey, Guess what? You don't fall on your ass when you wear Microspikes!! If you recall my post over a year ago on Rattlesnake Mt I crashed and burned about 5 times. I was also wearing jeans. Oh the lessons I have learned. 
I any case I have a great and easy trek to both summits and then decided to take the side trek .4 miles to NH. Really just because I could.
Shortly down the trail I see 2 woman walking towards me, slogging along in the snow when I think Hey, I have more geek equipment on my back. I stopped at a conveniently placed log and traded my spikes for snow shoes and happily moved along. 
I no longer feel like a geek when I pass women with a bottle of water and a granola bar and I have my pack on.
Gear can be cool bitches!

Why is it so hard to be different?

Lately I feel inundated with examples of the World just not minding their business and letting people live their life. I appreciate that you have an ideal that you think is life but that doesn't mean it is mine. If I choose to live differently that does not make me weird, a moon bat, dumb, unsafe, Democratic/Republican or any number of other derogatory words. ( Just a few examples of adjectives I've seen used)
Add to that a person who is not so concrete in her IDGAF and things can get interesting. 
A recent personal experience was the one that opened my eyes a little bit more.
Let me first say that the man I was speaking to did not in any way make these feelings come out because he was rude or disrespectful but nevertheless the lesson was learned. 
So I am carrying on in my own freakish, silly, sarcastic way and all of a sudden he says " Wait a minute, you are loosing me. Are we talking about A or B?" 
( I'm not explaining A or B as it was personal but you get the jist)
I quickly stumble and start to feel uncomfortable. 
Oh wait, let me tuck all this weird me back in. I didn't realize I had let so much out and was showing you who I really was. It'll just take a sec and a couple of apologies.

Later that evening I am working on my new (epic, can't wait to post about it) puzzle and analyzing it like only I can.
Well, he was nice and funny and cute. That was a shame. I assume he's shaking his head and won't be using my phone number any time soon.  Trust me this has happened to me more than once. 
But I'm not a total self mutilator because I also think Hey, someday you'll find your freak girlfriend, don't you worry. 
Ding.....another text. 
Hey, did you know people sometimes just don't text back because they are out to dinner with a friend? Yeah, that can happen. :)
Now I begin to turn this negative thinking around. It slowly kills my spirit to still have feelings like this about myself. I know it takes time but I will keep weeding out these thoughts and reversing them. Like rooting out a weed.
And I even cry just a little because the sad reality is I will lose many more people like this man and it is not because there is anything wrong with me but if I were to stuff all my weird back in to be what I think is the proper woman  I will be killing my spirit with incredible speed. Like Lightning.
And then I think~

Being different is sometimes very hard. Standing in this World naked with just your luggage takes courage. You may think your bags are packed a little more than others, a little messier, they have a few too many flashy stickers on them and maybe they are a little worn out but they are yours and they are full of some awesome shit.
I am not sure where this World ( I blame it on religion but I won't go there) got the idea and taught us that if we don't see, do, eat, think, whatever like everyone else we are strange.....or even different. 
Though this post I now see more and more that the words I sometimes use to describe myself are self-depreciating. I do this without even a thought, it is ingrained so deep. 
So instead I will push ahead with my ideas about life. This is my gospel.
1. Eat real food, the fake crap is what is your problem. 
2. Exercise, you are dying on your couches.
3. Get outside. It is therapy and there is no co-pay. ( Ok, so I spend a lot of money but you don't have to)
4. Cell phones, TV, Video games and the Internet are killing our conversations. God, I miss good conversations. When was the last time you shared your dreams with someone?
5. Texting is killing our relationships. 
6. Mental Health is a real thing. It affects us physically more than we will ever be able to prove and it deserves a shit ton more of our attention than we give it. Get help, don't be ashamed. Find your therapy because it comes in endless forms.
7. Get your groove on. Whatever way you can that makes your heart full of joy, even if you have to do it alone. 

Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Lost posts continue

I blogged away last week about the miles that my feet took me and the distances that I could see from those Mountain tops but I don't think you can estimate the length of travel that happens inside you.
It's hard to explain but sometimes things pop into your head while you are so focused on what your body is doing. I guess my rapid fire brain needs the distraction of me focusing on scrambling wet rocks to get a clear message out. Some of these messages are things you need to hear but don't want to. Needless to say the woods are a great place to leave negative feelings and tears and walk out with fresh, tender new ideas.
Some of these things happen subconsciously, your responses change and you don't even realize it until something comes up and you answer differently than you ever have before.

****I decided to blog today and found this as well as 2 other posts in pending. Unfinished. Mid thought.****

I can't even begin to explain how true this post is today. Epically.
I have spent a week twisting and turning and today I opened my eyes feeling a little better. A little stronger. A little ready to step forward again.

I am acutely aware that I am standing alone but I am better off standing alone than in an unhealthy herd.

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Pemetic, Gorham, Beehive and the Ocean Oh My!

After a heavy dose of NyQuil and a few slices of Veggie pizza I woke up from the dead with a little spunk back. The weather today was spectacular. 50-60's and sunny. I decided to head out and turn back if my lungs weren't having it. 
The only stumble was that the coffee maker in my cottage died. Breakfast, packed foods and headed to a little market down the road just before the Acadia entrance. 
I have already hiked this trail but down so I decided to try it up. Pemetic is only 1248 ft but this trail ascended in half a mile. I really just wanted to do it for the Ravine. It involves 2 small ladders which weren't hard just cool and spooky.
Away I go at 9:30.

The Summit was beautiful with ocean views everywhere and the Moon was there!! See it between the 2 signs.

I had to take the .2 mile gaunt to the Summit and then return to this sign where I could take the North Ridge Trail. This was very cool. It extended the descent to 1.1 miles and then I got on a gorgeous trail full of color along Eagle Lake and through the woods back to my car.

So here I am back at the parking lot at 12:25. I am snacking over my Map.
I have only today and I still haven't gone to Sandy Beach or Thunderhole.
I make a plan because obviously I like to work myself to the last shred of energy.
Don't ask, I do not know what this building is. I just though this place was great. I meant to go to the Museum and get educated on the history of Acadia but by the time I got to town the museum was closed.

The Park Loop road is one way for a good portion so I had to carefully plan where I was going to park or be stuck looping around miles again. If I parked way down South at Gorham Mountain I could hike north to the Beehive and then down to the Ocean Path-think the Ocean boardwalk in Newport but no mansions.

Disregarding my own advice I took a little .3 mile side trail called Cadillac Cliffs and I am glad I did. It added the coolest little cliffs, rungs and this little cave to climb through.

The lesson learned today-The size of the mountain doesn't really matter. I posted this sign up close so you can see it is only 525' but it gave the most beautiful views ever.

The Beehive Trail is described as one of the most difficult if you are afraid of heights or if it is wet. There are cliffs and rungs. I took a right following the signs to the Summit. I was thinking I would turn around if it got to be too much for me. Once I passed the Summit I encountered a woman coming back towards me so I asked and she explained it is not advised to go down this trail only up.
As you can see the blue blaze goies sort of over the edge to no where. I did see a side trail and descended a bit and was able to climb up about 30feet. Kind of pissed because I think I could have done it but at this point I was getting tired and still a few miles from the car so I had to give up.

Crap!! The Bowl was a beautiful hidden little pond where I dipped my feet in the cool water but I didn't take any photos. Too busy enjoying myself I guess.
Exhausted doesn't even touch it when I enter the Ocean Path and see .7 miles. I am actually parked farther in the next lot but its mostly flat.

Thunderhole was quiet at this time of day but still really beautiful. I stood at the farthest place down at that platform and just listened to the waves. The sound of the ocean was peaceful and a gentle sign that I really am ready to go home.

Race Results

09/07/07 Main Street Mile 11:44
05/18/08 YPD 5k 52:57 17:05
06/14/08 Walpole Village 5K 35:27 11:26
06/21/08 Mashpee Fun Run 34:21 11:05
07/19/08 Mashpee Woodlands 36.49 11:52
08/10/08 Falmouth Road Race 1:29:31
08/25/08 Women Running Wild 35:40 11:30
10/25/08 Mashpee Firefighters 37:47 12:10
05/02/09 Cape Abilities 5K 34:59 11:17
05/17/09 YPD 5K 36:41 11:50
08/09/09 Falmouth Road Race 7mi 1:37
10/31/09 Mashpee Firefighters 5K 37:15 12:00
09/11/11 Main Street Mile 12:31
10/29/11 Screech to the Beach 5K 39.13 12:20
08/12/12 Falmouth Road Race 1:34:24 13:29
05/18/14 YPD 5k 44.25 14:17
06/1/14 June Jog 4mi 1:04 16:00
08/17/14 Falmouth Road Race 1:42:04 14:35
09/27/14 Girly Girl 5K 37:24 12:02
10/26/14 Pell Bridge Run 4mi 48:41 12:10
11/27/14 Turkey Trot in VA 5K 35:22 11:23
12/06/14 Jingle Jog 5K 34:42 11:11
03/29/15 Thomas Guinta Memorial 5K 34:14 11:03
04/19/15 St. Margaret's 5K 31:11 10:21
05/17/15 YPD Blues 5K 34:58 11:17
06/07/15 Newport 10 Miler 1:56:09 11:36
06/20/15 Mackenzie's 5K 33:55 10:54
08/17/14 Falmouth Road Race 1:33:51 13:24
10/31/15 Screech at the Beach 36:19 11:40