It's almost over.

Only 2 weeks left. I am hoping this will get better when school is over. Yesterday I did get a note home from Olivia's teacher that she lost recess due to her not completing her work. She was given the story to finish during her 20 minute recess and she still couldn't complete it. The only good thing is she isn't fooling and chatting like I expected. She is quietly sitting there but when it comes time to show her work the paper has 1 sentence written. The notes says-"This is not the work of a 1st grader in June" Terrific!
I immediately panic. Oh yeah, chest it tightening up. I am not home enough with her. I see her in the morning and once she gets on the bus I don't see her again until tomorrow morning. Thank you employment! I have been doing this for years so no daycare is needed but it is getting more complicated. Now that Dad is not here I want to be home in the evenings but daycare is too expensive, as you all know. I am riding out the Summer on nights but am in the planning stages to go to days in the Fall. Thinking this would be better for them. WTF! I need daycare for Ava before AND after preschool. I am grateful that she got into the title I program as it is free but now how to fill the hours around that program. I also need care for Olivia before and after school. All so I can be home for the few hours they are awake in the evening. Is this worth it? I do not know. This may be another cause of this anxiety. I want to limit the bouncing around and get them on a more regular schedule but it feels like I am just adding to their train ride of life. I would also be putting them with someone else from 7:20am until 4:30 pm and that is a difficult nugget for me to swallow both financially and emotionally.
It is funny to say this but how do "regular" working people do this? I have the opportunity to work Monday thru Friday 8-4-bankers hours-and it is the hardest thing for me to adjust to. Oh and this isn't until October. I am trying to look into options for daycare now before it gets too late and I can't find anything but most people I have talked to want an all day commitment-which I totally understand. I also don't want to compromise and send her to a crappy place just because they have space.
I obviously need to get back to my yard work. Garden-therapy was working for a while. Besides when I lose the house I want it to look good for the auction.